Heart Motivations

I am feeling a little low the last couple days, God has been downloading a lot of stuff to me and most of it has been very convicting. I am thankful for people who God had placed in my life to point out the things I don't see, but honestly it is really hard to hear sometimes. I have been the "nice guy" for so much of my life, nice guys don't have faults, and they are really humble in a prideful way.
I have become really passionate about a men's ministry tool called "Men's Fraternity", which has really impacted me on my healing journey. Naturally since it has helped me so much I have gotten really passionate about bringing it to other men so that they may enjoy the freedom that I have been given. But there was something that just has not been sitting right with me, and has given me a caution. When promoting the material to others I have felt like a salesman and my spirit really questions that. Should we ever have to try to sell God? Of course not! God living inside of us should impact those around us that they want what we have.
Just yesterday morning I was having breakfast when God just spoke to me while I was text messaging Darcy. When I heard it I didn't want to believe it, but I knew it was the truth. The reason I have been so passionate about bringing Men's Fraternity to other men is really speaking of the insecurities inside of me. Deep down my feelings have been that I have nothing to offer myself.
I have never realized until now how dishonoring that is to God, after all it is He who is doing the healing in me, not a program. He is the one who has brought my heart to a point where it can be molded and used for his purposes. God does use programs, organizations and people but He is the one behind it all.

And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns. Philippians 1:6

It is amazing how you can fool yourself, and tell yourself that I am doing what I am doing for God's glory and not for my own. This is especially true when it comes to doing things in the Church or for some sort of ministry. After all it is for God, how can it be wrong.
I have enough on my plate right now, but I know from past experience that one of the scariest prayer I have prayed was for God to reveal things in my heart that I did not know where there.